Parents? words that do not show respect to a child have two things in common: ignore the feelings of the child and focus on teaching. As a result their message is: “Your feelings are wrong. It would be better for you, if you felt and experienced as I did”. An answer expressing lack of respect makes the child feel stupid, his self-esteem is lowered. Such conversations are devoid of educational effect which the parents want. As a result, the child does not learn to respect others. Child learns to respect – out of the fear – the power of the second man.
Examples:
– You will pay for a visit from your pocket, if you do not calm down …
– Be a man! Behave!
– Surely it does not hurt!
– I am ashamed of you.
– I will leave you here!
– If you are polite, I’ll buy you something.
– I will just grab you by the hand (which covers the mouth) in a moment and will not let go.
– I’ll tell your dad, you’ll see!
– If you leave the chair, I will spank you!
– I will get heart attack because of your teeth!
– Doctor is sad because of you! She/he will not like you!
– You do not need a tooth image, you need the image of the brain!
What did you feel reading these sentences?
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